Gutfeld! : FOXNEWSW : August 14, 2024 7:00pm-8:00pm PDT : Free Borrow & Streaming : Internet Archive (2024)

>> sean: please set your dvr so you never missed an episode of "hannity". in the meantime let not your heart be troubled. greg gutfeld is up to put a smile on your face. have a great night.

[ ♪♪ ] [applause] >> greg: yes. how expected of you. happy wednesday, everyone. senior executive for disney, abc news which is hosting the executive debate is a close major personal donor of kamala harris. disney is we are shooing viewers this will have no effect on the debate as they were planning on [beep] trump all along. nikki haley urges trump to quit whining about calmly here was avoiding the press and get back to what he does best, insulting nikki haley. mark zuckerberg has unveiled an

outlandish roman statue of his wife. meanwhile, his wife unveiled this highly accurate statue of him. 210 dogs and owners showed up for a movie event in vermont just a few shy of a guinness world record. unfortunately there were a few last-minute cancellations. they always work. washington dc has once again been named the least desirable city in america according to a new poll. the mayor disagrees saying they did not pull enough carjackers. as a dc's unpopularity due to crime or homelessness or cost-of-living? it could be just a rat problem. a study found that ugly people tend to live shorter lives than

those who are good-looking. i guess i better get my affairs in order, said one man. they like the insults. what is going on here? let's do a model log. anybody remember that thing that happened one month ago with former president donald trump when his ear looks like van gogh? funny how that is all growing sort of fuzzy already. the story, not the ear. thanks to our ever incurious media it is now fading like joe biden's memories of today's breakfast. could that ugly event to be part of a bigger problem? couldn't be there was a shift in modern life or norms of behaviour and confidence have been disrupted by the very questioning of the norms and standards themselves. you can see and feel it in stores. customer service, doctors offices on the streets. and i would drug store where you have to call somebody to get deodorant. you can ask for tips on a screen after you served yourself.

the cop is free to commit another crime. protesters destroy public and private property. all charges are dropped. teachers take down world maps put a pride likes. menacing on subways is not impressive. it is like we replaced our country's foundation with quicksand. the idea that meritocracy is oppressive has finally fulfilled its dream. we are now equally incompetent. you can credit di to be sure, the proponents share love to praise it until the results porton. meanwhile, we forgo experience and training as we deem older generations as irrelevant. add to that the ubiquity of smart forms -- smart phones and you have a workflow's -- were first -- workforce too distracted to care. hack even i check facebook about judge jeanine complaining about teams. it turns out that the trump mess was no bug in the system it is the system. quote, "sources within the

services claimed that the agency has suffered more lapses then kat's car insurance,". while on duty in mara lago, instead of nudging security guards a week, the photos were circulated to others on the detail. the sleepers were never disciplined but everybody got a good laugh. in 2192 chinese nationals simply strode onto the grounds of terms florida home perhaps thinking that it was at disney's magic kingdom. words, the secret service cannot even protect itself. two months ago a man in shorts and a t-shirt walked through an open door in the miami field offices and spent the night. first he took a shower, then he downloaded on a computer. it is weird. i usually do those two things in reverse. you as well. next morning, he asked employees working to get a cup of coffee

and they got them coffee. i don't get treated that while at starbucks and i own starbucks. he was only caught when he entered a defensive tactics class and somebody asked who he was. that is like a brian kilmeade at a brian kilmeade book citing. >> he is a friend. >> greg: i know. look, no agency is perfect but when some clown can wander into a classified facility, watch p*rnography, spend the night, have breakfast, and the tent attractive -- tactical training session? it is -- is it any wonder that a whack job can ride up on a bike and shoot trump? last year drunk neighbour burst into the home of national security advisor jake sullivan. he probably took off when he saw sullivan. the guy looks like he escaped an autopsy. >> dam. >> greg: he get the secret service detail and somehow a drug got past the crack squad of the security detail. who was on post of that night?

paul bullard? two intruders recently breached security at obama's house in hawaii. there were not any guard dogs except on the menu. >> while. >> greg: when barack obama was president intruders jumped the fence and got inside. forget the conspiracy theories unless it is a conspiracy of decline. it is everywhere. true nepotism and di hires have real-world consequences. but the old-fashioned notion of meritocracy seems like a long way away. as we wake up to deteriorating cities, schools that indoctrinate but do not educate and law enforcement more handcuffed than the criminals. it is not just the secret service, it is society. we did not just break a few eggs to make an omelette. the erisa by the secret service see the result of a distracted, untethered generation divorced from direction or discipline.

this is not who america was. not the america that won two world wars or even the cold war. today we could not win the war on gingivitis. [applause] >> greg: let's welcome tonight's guests! like his kids, you get to see him twice a month. actor and comedian jamie lissow! sheet makes liberal rose tents with her common sense. host of emily saves america emily wilson! she is so libertarian she started charging her unborn baby rent. new york times best-selling author and fox news contributor kat timpf! he picks his teeth with the washington monument. new york that sometimes author and comedian tyrus! jamie, i bet you can relate with the secret service and that you both struggle to do the one job that youse are supposed to do.

>> twice a month. i wish. i have very similar things with my divorce that happened and this whole assassination thing. the guy was on the roof and they did not see it for a long time that happened to be when i came home early from work. rumour has it they were two shooters. >> enjoy court. >> this article is really frightening. the two guys falling asleep? i do feel for those guys a little bit. when i was in bed with my girlfriend she claimed i fell asleep and it was my turn. you said in your monologue that everything is being locked up. i do not live in new york. i just noticed that for the first time. i want to buy toothpaste. toothpaste is locked up.

deodorant is locked up. soap is locked up. i have been looking at some of the homeless in new york and i do not think they use that stuff. i do not think that we need to block it out. it is a very touchy situation because some of those secret service agents did when the moment was fired they were human shields. some of them really tried to do their jobs and greg, you know that i love coming on your show but i do not know if i can be a human shield. that is a level of loyalty. i would be like what if i just brought a shield? do you know what i mean? does that have to be me? can i just a? >> greg: i don't know. >> i brought a shield. >> greg: that would help i will take that shield. i do feel bad for the secret service because they are just trying to do their job. it feels like administrative decline, certain kinds of policies, emily, that they are enacting. i do not think it is just about

secret service. there is a five and all of our institutions that i feel like we somehow abandoned some kind of desire for, i don't know, higher achievement or competence? >> i was going to say especially with service in places like los angeles everywhere you go now you were literally a burden. things are locked up and you asked them to come over and they are like and i'm like i'm sorry what else are you doing? when you go to the restaurant at some point i will look at my boyfriend like did we do something to this person. are we in a lawsuit? did we did somebody in their family. why am i being treated this bad. they will give you that think the tip and it starts at 22 %. 22 % is insane. a tip is when you have excellent service. now they do it on very weird medical procedures. i've been asked for her to. so i said if i do not tip are you going to botch me next time i am in here? >> greg: now i am thinking about what medical procedure you have.

>> it is just laser to be fair which is very normal. but if i do not tip you what is going to happen next time? >> greg: i usually group that when i go play laser tag so i knocked you out at once. >> very similar. >> greg: is? i don't know. kat, is this something that is it fair to be specific to secret service? i do not think it is unfair to them. i think this is something we are seeing everywhere. >> i would not place it specifically on te i either. i would place it on a lack of accountability that i think it spans across many government institutions. think about the two secret service agents found sleeping at mara lago. they were not in any trouble for that. what job could you be sleeping at cannot get in trouble. there was no job. there really is. cashier. think about a cashier. let alone two cashier's.

heads would roll at that chipotle. >> greg: yes. >> arguably less important than protecting the life of a former president, current presidential candidate. arguably. no job. you can't sleep. you will face consequences. why would you try if you do not have to? >> greg: i think if you give these guys enough rest of their job is so important they do not have them work around the clock. i do not know. you our bodyguard. >> there were some things that you have to there is no feel sorry for. if you are executive protection you are executive protection or you were not. there is not a, to your point, somebody's bowl of chipotle burrito getting [beep] up is not the same thing as a belinda bencic off my ear. there is some levels to it.

the bigger thing is that we are in a cultural war in this country. the other day somebody was giving me [beep] like you were not religious. no i am not religious but our entire country is based off christianity values. hardware, meritocracy, but your best foot forward, the 10 commandments we follow it. whether you are an atheist or not you still grow up in this culture. what we are seeing since the pandemic its a revote from that culture. they do not want any of the things that are customs have pushed. i will hire anybody who can do the job because it is my right to do the job and try the job. so it is a completely different mindset. they are hiring people who only want to get the job and then as soon as they get the job the first thing they tell you is the days that they need off. >> greg: yes. >> it is not the same where you come in the ground level and i am going to work every day and be that guy because hard work pays off, integrity pays off.

you do good things good things happen. i don't want to do any of that. i want the job. but i am tired i am going to take a nap. i will take the snap and they do not get fired because the supervisor is probably taking a nap as well. across the board a huge cultural battle right now. >> greg: we have to move on. up next. thank you. they are plotting. kamala pushes a fake news to change people's views. [applause] thanks to a unique combination of herbs, iberogast helps relieve six digestive symptoms to help you feel better. six digestive symptoms. the power of nature. iberogast. looking for a smarter way to mop? try the swiffer powermop. ♪ an all-in-one cleaning tool that gives you a mop and bucket clean in half the time ♪ our cleaning pad has hundreds of scrubbing strips that absorb and lock dirt away, ♪ and it has a 360-degree swivel head

that goes places a regular mop just can't. so, you can clean your home, faster than ever. ♪ don't mop harder, mop smarter, with the swiffer powermop. hey folks, chris counahan here with leaffilter, america's largest gutter and gutter protection company. leaffilter has over 150 locations and has been installed on over a million homes. we've been protecting homes now for over 20 years. our patented technology offers total protection for your home and comes with a lifetime transferable warranty. the process is simple. give us a call to schedule your free gutter inspection. if you decide to move forward with the project, you put nothing down at all. 833 leaffilter or visit leaffilter.com today.

oooh! refill? help yourself man. dude? dog food in the fridge? it's not dog food. it's freshpet. real meat. real veggies. real weird. he was bad luck anyway. freshpet, it's not dog food. it's food - food.

here's why you should switch fo to duckduckgo on all your devie duckduckgo comes with a built-n engine, like google, but it's r and doesn't spy on your searchs and duckduckgo lets you browsel but it blocks cookies and creepy ads that follow youa and other companies. and there's no catch. it's fre. we make money from ads, but they don't follow you aroud join the millions of people taking back their privacy by downloading duckduckgo on all your devices today.

>> a story and five words. >> greg: kamala campaign is headlining. emily, google search results. they use altered headlines that they created.

making a change to make her look better. that seems a little greedy to me because the articles are already slated to make her look better. not enough? >> very smart. think about how many people are reading anything to be hot -- besides the headlines. they are literally paying for misinformation. the articles or pick for real but they are paying to do sponsorship as well so they are picking the headline and manipulating it to be super positive. let's be real these people are not reading past the headline. smart on their part. >> greg: i read everything. that is my job. kat, you know that. i will just click away for hours. that is what they call me. click. >> you are a clicker? >> greg: i am a clicker. all of this done without the knowledge of the news outlet involved. is this unethical? >> work smarter not harder, i guess. you see why they would do it.

isn't politics in general unethical? a lot of it? >> greg: yes. >> most people just read headlines. i think a lot of people have entire philosophies of things just like scrolling headlines on a tour that. a lot of the times now when you click the headline they will say put in your e-mail and you were like a know. you were asking a lot. >> greg: you were out of your three free articles. >> okay three? see you. i will remain uninformed. >> greg: i will wait until the first of the month when i get two others. >> because if i put in my e-mail you will send me 100 e-mails a day. so i think a lot of people especially if they don't it's like i'm fine, i'll just forget about it. so this is really taking advantage of something that we all know is a bad thing. i think that information is a good thing and people really go they headlines is a bad thing. they're using it to their advantage. i mean how many people actually read the whole article.

>> greg: 's they have no idea she is flip-flopping on policies or she has radical policies. they don't even know she is behind the tax on tips. now they just know she does not want to have taxes on tips. the media does not do anything to fix that, tyrus. i do not even think the media would have complained if it would have been exposed to. >> they are not complaining because they would be running real stories. they would be surrounded care asking for a questions. follow-up question. wouldn't that be nice? >> what you mean by that? >> how so? that is my favourite thing. how so? it does not matter what jamie asks me. i'm so? >> what do those words mean? >> how so? so simple. they don't do that. they are getting greedy. the media is already doing this [beep] for them. all we will tweak it a little bit more. at some point is somebody in the media is going to get tired or not get credit for this because they are all part of the same campaign. we need to stop saying that the

media is pushing kamala. they are on the same team. they wear the same uniform. now she is telling them how to do their job better. hope i don't know in october they get tired of it. and they be time she is going to keep doing which is going to do it -- do and the only one who is crying foul is nobody. the media is like so what? >> greg: for the media, kamala is the second, younger wife. they finally unloaded the old guy. that would be like the old lady. now they have the younger one and they are letting her do whatever she wants. right? jamie? you have kids. right? >> i certainly do. >> i saw the court order. >> greg: is this what kids do with report cards. they have a f. and they do a little line and they turned that up into an eight. except in this case it is an a. towards an a+. >> or an a minus and you make a

line. actually i said that thing about not inputting e-mail addresses. i thought it was the only one who would not get were articles. i got one today and apparently it was like a 41-dollar you can have free articles for the rest of your life. i was like i do not think so. i am not entering. so kamala, i don't know how to pronounce. i don't know how to pronounce her name as you know if it is kamala or kamala. nimick or maybe she has been saying it wrong. maybe she is changing things defending who she is talking to. the whole time i was reading this i said i wish i could afford her publicist. right? for my show. say nobody showed up. they would put the headline would be like room to stretch out at jamie lissow show. if my show gets cancelled they would be like a median jamie lissow does not disappoint.

say biden his diaper. they go president has new life, to lose 3 pounds instantly. that was one step too far. i have a public service announcement i want to share with you that i have had prepared. [ ♪♪ ] >> jamie lissow's lessons. tips from a divorced dad. [ ♪♪ ] >> hi, divorced dad's. never forget to send your kid a birthday card on their birthday. i would have but they never sent me the new address. [ ♪♪ ] >> jamie lissow's lessons. tips from the worst data. >> greg: that was sad. but it brings us all down, jamie. you truly are a comedian's comedian. up next, colbert's little gaff

yields a big audience laugh. (tony hawk) skating for over 45 years has taken a toll on my body. i take qunol turmeric because it helps with healthy joints and inflammation support. why qunol? it has superior absorption compared to regular turmeric. qunol. the brand i trust.

i have dry eye... tired, itchy, burning... my symptoms got worse over time. my eye doctor explained the root was inflammation—so he prescribed xiidra. xiidra works differently. xiidra targets inflammation. over-the-counter drops don't do this. they only hit pause on my symptoms. but twice-daily xiidra gives me lasting relief. xiidra treats the signs and symptoms of dry eye disease. don't use if allergic to xiidra and seek medical help if needed. common side effects include eye irritation, discomfort, blurred vision, and unusual taste sensation. don't touch container tip to your eye or any surface. before using xiidra, remove contact lenses and wait fifteen minutes before re-inserting. dry eye over and over? it's time for xiidra. (♪) type 2 diabetes? discover the ozempic® tri-zone. ♪ ♪ i got the power of 3. i lowered my a1c, cv risk, and lost some weight. in studies, the majority of people reached an a1c under 7 and maintained it. i'm under 7.

ozempic® lowers the risk of major cardiovascular events such as stroke, heart attack, or death in adults also with known heart disease. i'm lowering my risk. adults lost up to 14 pounds. i lost some weight. ozempic® isn't for people with type 1 diabetes. don't share needles or pens, or reuse needles. don't take ozempic® if you or your family ever had medullary thyroid cancer, or have multiple endocrine neoplasia syndrome type 2, or if allergic to it. stop ozempic® and get medical help right away if you get a lump or swelling in your neck, severe stomach pain, or an allergic reaction. serious side effects may include pancreatitis. gallbladder problems may occur. tell your provider about vision problems or changes. taking ozempic® with a sulfonylurea or insulin may increase low blood sugar risk. side effects like nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea may lead to dehydration, which may worsen kidney problems. living with type 2 diabetes? ask about the power of 3 with ozempic®. (♪) when you get your tools from harbor freight something about the job feels different - your wallet. whatever you do, do it for less, at harbor freight. save even more at our parking lot sale this weekend

>> it is coming your way. it is a video of the day. >> greg: thank you. i know, even a brainwashed audience knows that see an end really blows. stephen colbert and anchor caitlin collins bring us are video of the day. watch what happens when he tells her see an and subjective. >> i know you guys are objective over there that you report the news as it is. >> i know, cnn makes a... >> was not supposed to be a laugh line? >> it was not supposed to be but i guess it is. >> greg: it was not supposed to be a lifeline but it share is. even the audiences in on the joke that see an and is objective even if the host and guest are not. there was a real laugh like that on the late show?

that was before stephen letterman quit. that is him, by the way. tigris, they were kind of shocked by the reaction. >> they live in their bubble. the fact that she was on there as a celebrity supposed to be a journalist but that is what they're trying to do trying to make their journalists like a cool and hip. because the truth is out there. i think that gives me hope that the people are not buying it. i love how uncomfortable they both were. their bubble got burst for a second. was that supposed to be funny? and people are like do you not hear yourself spee?

do not see the behaviour that cnn is putting up. you were not even news anymore. you are the anti-trump network. that is all you do. this is the same thing. this is the new trump public defender number 1. they are trying to push her. she will get a book. after trump wins or whatever then she will fade away. the last batch from the last time that she was and where are they? it is a broken record. they just keep doing it over and over again. it is funny because it stephen colbert with his 17 writers or 30 writers it is the bit that everybody laughed that. the serious bit. that is why we are number 1. >> greg: it is really bad when the audience hears you being serious and assumes it is a joke. i think we call it the jesse watters effect. >> i have another theory on this. i think that this shows actually that stephen colbert does not watch cnn. i think it is so obviously slanted. he says you guys in the news. but who watches it? really? not that many people. why would you watch it. i think there was no way that you actually think it is objective. it was for a bit so people are kind of resting got that. you assume that nobody has noticed but this is painfully

obvious. >> greg: there was a time. i mean the gulf war that was the shining moment of cnn. from there it kind of... >> i do not think they are striving for that anymore. that used to be what they would strive for but i do not think that anybody is even really pretending that is the case. >> greg: you know what happened. that is when they had don lemmon and chris coble as commentators. >> they called themselves anchors. call yourself what you are. >> and acyl. >> greg: that is what i do. jamie, it seems like cnn is headed for disaster. you've experienced that with your first marriage. is there any advice you can give them or is there any way they could turn that truck around? >> i do not know. and speaking of anchors "the view" has four literal anchors. >> greg: terrible. >> that was kind of terrible.

it is interesting that laughter shows the truth. if he says see an and is objective and everybody laughs everybody agrees that that is not true. a very quick way. they actually experienced this on stage once. i was going back and forth with the heckler. true story. he goes, why don't you get a tighter sure to? and everybody laughed. i threw the shirt away. they were right. all the laughter meant that they were right. i almost wish that everybody could have seen there was so much in this. i don't know tyrus said it best this is not the guest of the johnny carson would have on. or funny celebrity. and the interview for she says no trump is scrambling and the vibe is not what it used to be like. right after that she says i am a journalist. she says as a journalist we do not make assumptions. we follow the story. but she just said that kamala was going to win. i wish they had shown she was a beautiful woman and you can see

it better. with the chair she is wearing has buttons. and also a zipper. and also a buckle. i think your dress is an escape room. can you imagine getting dressed in the morning and have to ask for a clue. >> greg: jamie, by the way, your pants are too tight. >> i think that proves they are just right. >> greg: emily, were you surprised by the reaction of stephen colbert's audience. i assume they might have agreed with that. >> i was a little surprised but when i think of the audiences i think they are almost held captive. i feel like everybody is watching them. you know you need to lack you have no other choice. but also this was the first real laugh you got in years and it was an unintentional joke. i cannot believe that this is the dancing beetles for kovinic. there was a great a great comedic skit. >> greg: i guess i would say that is probably one of the all-time classic moments of

stephen colbert the dancing vivos peered -- beetles. propaganda television for covid-19. i think that is a good sign that the audience is now savvier than the people in front of them. that is a sign that may be the viewing public has been red pilled into understanding that it is all complete and utter bull [beep]. >> you know the laughter signed? he is going to have a don't laugh sign. >> greg: very good. coming up how tampon tim setough people straight if they were not endorsed by eight. s it gets. but trelegy has shown me that there's still beauty and breath to be had. because with three medicines in one inhaler, trelegy keeps my airways open and prevents future flare-ups.

and with one dose a day, trelegy improves lung function so i can breathe more freely all day and night. trelegy won't replace a rescue inhaler for sudden breathing problems. tell your doctor if you have a heart condition or high blood pressure before taking it. do not take trelegy more than prescribed. trelegy may increase your risk of thrush, pneumonia, and osteoporosis. call your doctor if worsened breathing, chest pain, mouth or tongue swelling, problems urinating, vision changes, or eye pain occur. ♪ what a wonderful world ♪ ask your doctor about once-daily trelegy for copd because breathing should be beautiful. meet the jennifers. jen x. jen y. and jen z. each planning their future through the chase mobile app. jen x is planning a summer in portugal with some help from j.p. morgan wealth plan. let's go whiskers. jen y is working with a banker to budget for her birthday. you only turn 30 once. and jen z? her credit's golden. hello new apartment. three jens getting ahead with chase. solutions that grow with you. one bank for now.

for later. for life. chase. make more of what's yours. weathertech products are designed and manufactured in america using only american raw materials. most competitors make things seven thousand miles away... and then wonder why they don't fit. with weathertech in your vehicle you may hear angels singing as you marvel, how do they do it? simple. american technology and american workers deliver quality... not imported junk for a few bucks less. get the world's best floorliners and support america. find your fit at wt.com (♪) how do you keep your teeth so white with all the coffee you drink? my secret lumineux whitening strips. i mean, that is white. and because there's no sensitivity,

i feel like i can use them more often. and you can get this at walmart or target. mixtiles is all about finding creative ways to share your family's story. you peel off the back, stick these up and make small adjustments. it's like a living photo album, in a way. they see themselves and they feel loved, that's what i want. yeah, that was nice.

>> we have another clip for you. it is video of the day part two. >> greg: walz left blm riot loot but it is law-abiding

citizens he preferred to shoot. this comes from minnesota in late may 2020 the height of fiery anarchy and the covid-19 pandemic. riots, arsonists, thugs, targeted minneapolis without a care in the world and nobody to stop them. people enforcing walz's 8:00 pm curfew by shooting paintballs and residents standing outside their porches. >> they just keep coming. >> go inside! get inside! in your house now, let's go! go inside now! get in the home! [beep] >> get in! get in! get in! >> get in the home! [beep]

>> our you okay? you got hit? >> greg: right in the. i usually pay 100 back -- bucks for this. this cannot be overstated then governor tim walz prioritize blasting residents with paintballs for breaking curfew but could not care less when people broke into the building could set him on fire. imagine how tough he would have been in iraq if he actually showed up. i guess we know where his balls went. kat, you called out his authoritarian measures during the pandemic including baseline. >> this is real i think we have the recording of what it said actually. >> hello, you have reached the lips a stay-at-home hot line. the information you leave is considered public information. at the tone please leave the following information. your name, your call back number, houthi stayed home --

stay at home or order is being violated, and where the stay at mo -- stay-at-home order is being violated. >> it was real. that is real. there is a government hotline. i am not over the covid-19 thing. the fact that the government grounded all of us as adults. made a stay home. we had to just sit there and take it regardless of if you have had your business shut down or your loved one was going to die alone. there has been no accountability. for any of this a. how are we not terrified this can happen again at? >> greg: you were right there is that word. accountability. it is gone beside the wayside. >> imagine hearing something like that before covid-19. you would think it was a joke. it was not a joke. >> greg: people were reporting people playing basketball. >> or going to somebody's house, officer. it is insane. >> greg: jamie, when you see your kids for those court

appointed visits do you play paintball? >> sometimes when i am alone with the kids i am like where is the cop. did you see some of this? it is frightening he had these dudes should be paintballs it. something along the line where this story is being represented wrongly. they are enforcing covid-19 measures. it is still not okay. it is still not okay in this instance. i was thinking maybe is it possible that the paintball, the one thing not being brought up is that it probably is super fun to shoot people with paintballs. >> greg: yes. >> even if it is wrong. if a copy gets really aggressive could we demote him to paintball gun? that saves you money. if he is still aggressive we get from a bow and arrow but it is the suction cup and post. the perpetrator is like i am hit!

point. you are okay. but some of the stuff the student does is absolutely something to look into. it is frightening. that is the one part where i go i would love an 8:00 pm curfew for everybody. >> greg: yes. >> i would like two to sleep. i used to do shows in naples it was the best we can deaf my life it. it was all older people. the late show was at 7:00 pm. the midnight show was at 9:00 pm. that makes no sense. but i feel like there was a lot to legitimately speak for it. >> greg: i am surprised they did not say the painted that paintball would help reduce your covid-19 symptoms. >> we know what that would label it as either way. no matter how you went down. let's not forget in california at the guy that was paddle boarding alone in the ocean and got arrested. and how crazy -- crazy they were with us. it is interesting watching this. i do not and will fight was on

the left if i would vote for somebody where part of the place he was running looks like a scene from the purge movie. literally what that looks like. let's be real when the next thing comes out they are going two even harder because they can saw -- they saw how much they can get away with because nobody is doing anything. i listen to an interview with a woman today. she had a business open in his state. he punished her to the harshest a standard. she spent 90 days in jail for keep a business open. this is a woman. talk about hitting the people of your own estate. >> greg: tyrus, do you think that we are so sideload will this change any minds? to look back on this and think that this is the kind of decisions that he makes. >> it should and it is hard to think that is america we are watching. it is frustrating. he could not have pulled that [beep] in louisiana. the good news in this is that

people have patterns. if this election starts to run away from kamala and the snitch he will quit and to run off. we will know we have it in the bag. every time it has gotten tough he has ran or he has done things like this where he gets control and power. that is what we should be concerned about. this could be as simple as that is how they are going to treat mega people. domestic terrorists. already labelled. if you are medically your curfew was 8:00 pm. will defund you if you don't do what we told you to do. we see what estate looks like. minnesota is a preview of america. that is how he governs. she is right with them. he is underneath her. the disorder is going to be the new america defending how we vote. i hope we have more people in the audience who are like colbert who are getting good and

saying this is a bow [beep]. you have a guy like this with this type of backbone at the country this is what we areat looking forward to. >> greg: he iss. giving paintball mya bad name. is making a statue of yoursh wife a sign of marital strife? my network and my tech need to keep up. thank you, verizon business. (kevin) now our businesses get fast and reliable internet from the same network that powers our phones. (woman) all with the security features we need. (aaron) because my businesses are my life. (kevin) man, the fish tacos are blowing up! (aaron) so whatever's next we're cooking with fire. let's make it happen! (vo) switch to the partner businesses rely on.

>> what did he do?

>> greg: welcome to our new segment. what did he do? i am your host brian williams. mark zuckerberg professed his love for his wife with a statue that he unveiled yesterday on his instagram page. this raises the question what did he... i have two to you. it says in my notes final word to you, tyrus. i can tell you cannot wait. >> normally would a guy [beep] up you have to put something glowing about your other half of your social media or give it to her. when you build a statue. our you asking her to raise the other one's baby? you know what i am saying? you did beyond the pale. this is did he knock her sister op? this is on that level. that dude who gets caught he

will go on social media and say i am an idiot. i messed up. make sure i put a poster every week. make sure i put her name on the ball. i wish to everybody that i have changed. and it is probably too late. it is probably too late. the statue, i don't even know were you go. >> greg: our like she is sitting there in that picture drinking coffee and a bathrobe. she doesn't even look like she is happy. this is a start but i am not impressed. >> in her pocket on speed dial is the lawyer. >> greg: yes. >> right underneath the accountant. >> greg: my theory, kat. is that she walked into him while he was in an of virtual reality sex workers. remember he created that met the universe, she walked in he was naked arms and legs akimbo.

>> i totally disagree with both of you. i think this is ridiculously minuscule. i think this is. these are not normal people. if my husband had the level of money that mark zuckerberg has i should have a statue garden just because. just one statue. no wonder she is like i was down here for the picture. standing here for that picture with the one single statue is disrespecting herself up. where is my amusem*nt park of coasters that look like me. >> greg: in this picture she is drinking at the time. like she is not even giving it the... >> but just one statue. after all of this? that is literally embarrassing. >> greg: emily, he is worth $180 billion. what is this worth. i bet this is worth millions of. >> it is worth at least half to him. [applause]

>> she has to do some dating courses or something. there was something very funny about everything. he is a little weird to me. i get major lizard vibes from him. i do not know what her deal is that she is with them. the artist actually i follow him he is one of the greatest artist on the planet i do believe that. i will give him credit. the whole thing is weird. if somebody gave me a statue she doesn't even care enough to get ready for the photograph. that is the funniest part about it. he did all of this and the photo that he posted it is like a morning cup of coffee. did not even bother getting ready. something is going on behind closed doors. >> the bathrobe does not match the rope. she did not care. >> greg: you say you know who the artist is a. do you know who is? how much that would run for? >> his pieces i have never even seen prices on. >> greg: jamie, your wife made a statue of you just so she could smash it into a million pieces like she did to your

heart. >> that it's right. when i saw that i said it is so small why did you make an actual size. if i made my fiancé a statue like that like happy you know she would go what is her name. immediately. i feel like this is one step up from relationship kiss of death. if you get a tattoo with the other person's name on it. and then you break up. this is one level above that. this is too permanent. who gets it in the divorce very confusing. i used two to a tattoo shop where we would help people that had their certificate at the tattooed and then they broke up. we did not remove the tattoo we were really good at riding is a pitch. >> greg: that is funny.pi shall wexe end with that? >> do not go away we will be right back. this is better. this is better. that's better. and that. even this. dupixent is an add-on treatment

for specific types of moderate-to-severe asthma. it works with your asthma medicine to help improve lung function. that's pretty good! dupixent is not for sudden breathing problems. it's proven to help prevent asthma attacks. it can reduce or even eliminate oral steroids. and doesn't that make things better? dupixent can cause allergic reactions that can be severe. tell your doctor right away if you have rash, chest pain, worsening shortness of breath, tingling or numbness in your limbs. tell your doctor about new or worsening joint aches and pain or a parasitic infection. don't change or stop asthma medicines including steroids, without talking to your doctor. when you can get more out of your lungs, you can du more with less asthma. and isn't that better? ask your doctor about dupixent, the most prescribed biologic in asthma. i am obsessed with olay's retinol body wash. with olay retinol body wash, 95% of women had visibly renewed skin. makes my skin feel so smooth and moisturized. olay body wash & lotion. discover yours.

most people call leaffilter when their gutters are clogged and they notice one of the many issues that can bring. sometimes it's the smell of mildew when water has seeped into the interior walls. or maybe they've spotted mold in the attic. but most often it's the more obvious signs of damage like rotten soffit, fascia, or water pooling near their foundation. you can get ahead of costly damage by protecting your home's gutters today. we're in your neighborhood and ready to help. schedule your free gutter inspection today, call 833 leaffilter, or visit leaffilter.com

i'm great got felled, love you america. >> i'm trace gallagher it's 11 on the eas

tv

Gutfeld looks at the news of the day through a satiric lens fused with pop culture and features refreshing takes on the day's top headlines from FNC personalities, authors, politicians, veterans and comedians.

TOPIC FREQUENCY

Greg 52, Jamie 8, Cnn 5, Jamie Lissow 5, America 5, New York 4, Emily 4, Stephen Colbert 4, Kat 3, Washington 2, Google 2, Starbucks 2, Disney 2, Kevin 2, Aaron 2, Minnesota 2, Walz 2, Colbert 2, Brian Kilmeade 2, Mark Zuckerberg 2

Notes

This material may be protected by copyright law (Title 17 U.S. Code).

info Stream Only